Moving forward!

In response to last week’s post –’Ticket to freedom!’, I received a number of requests for more explanation about whether to use the word ‘should’ … or not. This week we’re using ‘should’ in ways to move forward with living our ultimate Champagne Life.

Disempowering ourselves and others

The success of any communication starts with where we are coming from, while we are delivering it … whether we are coming from an empowering or disempowering context.

  • If we’ve been using the word ‘should’ to berate ourselves for not doing things we hoped would happen, but didn’t take any action on, we may be disempowering ourselves.
  • If we’re using the word ‘should’ to berate others … it’s a form of telling them what we think they ‘should’ be doing.
  • If our heart is in the right place, our words can be received by others as a contribution to them, or conversely, it arrives with them as a “don’t tell me what to do.”

Let’s face it … who loves being told what to do by others?

The key to moving forward is becoming a player

If we’re watching our favourite sport live, or on TV as a spectator, it’s easy to give our opinion about how we think the game needs to go … and what the players ‘should’ be doing. It can get us fired up, but it won’t change the result of the game … simply because we’re not on the field, course or court being a player. It’s called giving our opinion as a spectator. In short … watching the game and giving our opinion isn’t actually playing the game.

If we want to be a player rather than a spectator in living our Champagne Life and we want to make a difference with others, we can use questions to explore  ‘coulds’ as way of moving forward:

  • Have you thought of …?
  • What about …?
  • Have you considered …?

By using questions we are inviting participation from others rather than being a spectator telling the other ‘players’ what we think they ‘should’ be doing.

Taking inspired action on our ideas

Sometimes we may receive a ‘should’ which is a sudden thought that pops into our head out of nowhere. It’s an inner prompting or idea we hadn’t thought of previously. That can be a fabulous sign … like an inner knowing … suddenly you know what’s right for you … what you ‘should’ be doing.

An example from my own life is … an inner prompting that I ‘should’ go to see New Zealand win the Americas Cup in Perth in 1987. Although I wasn’t an avid yachting fan, I had enjoyed watching Australia win the previous America’s Cup on TV. I had an inner knowing that it was right for me to be there. I took inspired action and am now living a life in Perth I never dreamed would be possible at that time.

A sudden thought might be a nudge from our intuition to call someone or take a certain action. The important thing is that we act on it.

3 simple ways for moving forward with your Champagne Life

  1. Turn disempowering ‘could’ve, ‘would’ve and ‘should’ve events from the past into ‘coulds’ in the future and explore pathways to what is possible.
  2. Instead of being a spectator watching others, start being a player in areas you say are important and really matter to you.
  3. Listen to your inner promptings and start taking inspired action on ideas that you know are right for you.


By Maree Wrack

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